...
ROBERT AVERY: The ball is thrown from one end of the court to the other.
The ball must hit the ground no more than 6m
from your own goal, and must hit the ground again
at least 6m from the opposition's goal.
You defend it by throwing your body in front of it
The ball weight 1.25kg and has three bells in it.
Being thrown at you... probably today, only speeds up to about 25mph.
Blindfolds are worn so that it's a totally level playing field.
So whether you have no sight or a little bit of sight,
or you're fully sighted as you guys will be,
everybody can play.
REFEREE: [WHISTLES] Play!
[WHISTLES] Goal, Glasgow!
GARY BRANNAN: I will say, straight up, it looks like
when you're watching it quite a slow thing to watch.
There's not much happening, there's just people very gently lying down.
Actually, in the heat of it, when you're trying to discern
using only your ears -- which let's face it,
are knackered from years of headphone use anyway...
ROBERT AVERY: Hopefully they can hear the ball coming to them.
Tracking the ball is a skill that develops the more you play.
TOM SCOTT: You had a penalty!
GARY BRANNAN: I had a penalty to save. My own fault.
Instead of rolling the ball, I threw it.
REFEREE: [WHISTLES] High ball!
GARY BRANNAN: 'Cos what I went for was:
just lob yourself bodily in the direction of anything and scrabble about.
TOM SCOTT: You're a football goalkeeper!
MATT GRAY: You like a good dive, don't you?
GARY BRANNAN: So it's a case of, dingle-dangle, dingle-dangle...
...and I think it's passed me but I'd better make an effort anyway.
So I just lobbed... [LAUGHTER]
ROBERT AVERY: What you do is, you stretch yourself out as long as you can,
and then the best tip I can say is: tuck your face in behind your shoulder.
Because if your chin's behind your shoulder it doesn't hurt.
MATT GRAY: To think though, we played an international team!
TOM SCOTT: Technically! So that was the Glasgow Intermediate team.
GARY BRANNAN: We have represented Her Majesty the Queen(!)
TOM SCOTT: And we scored... zero.
Absolutely nothing.
MATT GRAY: Not one point
GARY BRANNAN: They weren't trying very hard. And we still scored nothing.
TOM SCOTT: Yeah. They got a lot in against -- we started getting, near the end...
we started getting it vaguely in the right direction.
MATT GRAY: But they'd cottoned on to the fact that we weren't getting anything,
and they were throwing lightly.
TOM SCOTT: Yes they were(!)
GARY BRANNAN: We didn't win.
Neither did we score.
Nor, frankly, did we look like we were going to score.
But we did hit 'em.
TOM SCOTT: Yes!
We are on the lookout for more sports to get just one point in.
So if you know any odd, unknown sports: tell us about them.
'Cos we might want to come and play.
You've got to be silent, the audience have to be silent, everyone has to be silent.
GARY BRANNAN: Hang on. Is a very loud fart a penalty?
TOM: [LAUGHTER] Yes. Yes it is. That's going to get you a noise penalty.
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